white owl

i have been unable to write or process anything lately. the overwhelming pain i have felt has been too deep to uncover anything worth writing. exposed pain is quite ugly. and freeing.

i have uncovered truths over the past several months that have shocked me. i guess i should correct myself and say... truths were uncovered for me.

i have believed a lie. it has tormented me to the point of insanity. i have served unconditionally. but i have served man. not my creator. what was i thinking.

it all is a bit too raw to reveal it all here. i can't process it all. i can't possibly feel it all at one time. i will simply lose all feeling. being numb seems not so bad.

not sure what to do next but this music is helping. thank you mr. garrels. white owl.